Week 31 Weigh-In: Creating a New Vision Board

164 lbs.

I found a computer and a few minutes to string together, so I thought I'd write a brief update.  Vacation has been fantastic!  I hiked and exercised at high altitudes, including a beautiful hike partially down the Grand Canyon.  My concerns about how my body would respond to high altitude were pleasantly unfounded.  I can now scratch that worry off my list for good, and it feels wonderful.

I'm thrilled to report that I stayed fully on program the whole time.  I passed up huge family dinners, birthday cake and wine (the hardest!)  At first, some family members didn't understand why I couldn't eat a healthy salad, but I was steadfast in sharing that this is a temporary part of my treatment, and that healthy foods will be coming into my life very soon.  I think some people remain skeptical, and see my program as a "fad" diet.  Maybe they weren't thinking this, but I just seemed to pick up on a vibe of them thinking "she is probably going to gain it all back after this is done."

Perhaps I'm projecting my own concerns onto them.  Who knows?  

I don't care what anyone thinks at this point in time.  This program has changed my life completely, and I'm having more fun and dressing better than I've been able to do for YEARS (I'm doing a happy dance right now and smiling from ear to ear!)

At the beginning of my adventure I wrote about imagining myself having more fun, engaging in healthy activities, wearing a bathing suit in public.  Here I am, about 8 months later, actually doing those things.  I laughed like a little kid as I went down a community water slide about 25 times!  My kids and nieces and nephews gave me high fives and even convinced me to go on the scary tube slide (only once).

I wished that I could have hiked all the way down the Grand Canyon.  Even going back up was fine, though I stopped every few levels.  My body felt energized and healthy and I just smiled inside, aware of this new experience.  I can't wait to eat a bit more and then push myself physically to do more.  This will happen in a few weeks, but until then, I'm not suffering, and I'm managing to have a blast!

This was the first time I had been on a water slide in 20 years!

This is me about a half mile down the Grand Canyon.  

Eventually these photos will be added to the Vision Board Part 2, with ME doing all of the fun activities I'd always dreamed of doing.  I'm trying to keep this feeling close to the surface, and at the forefront of my mind.  When I finally start eating again, and bump up against cravings, I want to be able to come back to these pictures and tell myself "no thank you, I've had enough" when my cravings steer me in the direction of carbs, or a second glass of wine.

Week 28 Weigh-In: Enjoying the Non-Scale Victories and New Self Confidence

172 lbs.

I am happy to report that 85 fewer pounds makes a huge difference in my life, and especially in my ability to enjoy outdoor activities.  The last time I visited Salt Lake City, UT to see my sister, I was really feeling the altitude, and I broke out in a sweat (even in the dead of winter) just walking around outside.  I don't have a typical sedentary family.  In fact, one of my sisters is very outdoorsy and athletic, and is always walking and moving around.  When I was overweight, it was uncomfortable or painful for me to exert myself to the level of everyone else, and as I reached my heaviest, I would flat-out have to pass on certain activities.  That was a painful memory and source of shame for me.

When I embarked on my weight loss program, part of my vision board contained the activity of hiking, because I have longed to hike with my family in the beautiful forest or in the desert.  This past weekend, my dream came true.  I didn't have any problems breathing in the altitude, and I had no trouble walking for miles (most days reaching my 10K steps before 9am!) without getting winded.  I was shocked and elated at how normal it all felt.  I just took it all in, as if I were in a dream.  The smell of the pine trees, the deliberate but confident steps down a slippery slope, and small steps going up a long hill.  The wildflowers were in full bloom, and the clouds in the sky were reflected in the beautiful lakes that we hiked to or around.

Below are some pictures of my adventures with my beautiful sisters (I'm on the far right):

Not the most flattering picture, but here I am carefully trying not to slip down the hill:

One of the biggest thrills was seeing this moose in the water!!

And here is the breathtaking mountain scenery!

So this is the post to remind me of how far I've come and how life-changing this experience has been.  All of the times I've said "no" to food have been worth it.

The scale didn't go down as much as I would have anticipated given the sharp increase in activity.  In fact, it was just an average weight-loss..  I did eat an extra shake on the days that we hiked or walked to an extreme.  I also had a soup with my family every night.  I knew I would need them!  When I got home, I was very motivated to keep moving and walking, since I had proven to myself that I could do it.  I am loving this new energy and physical fitness.  I treated myself to a new fitness toy and downloaded FitRadio.  I've been listening to the DJ mixes that keep me stepping to the beat and increasing my speed.  I'm channeling my inner 25 year old.

I hope you all are doing well on your programs, and taking some time to reflect on the small and large reminders of your progress.  It's nice to take a moment to enjoy the good things in life.

Edit:  Please give yourself a gift and take a second to read this beautiful post.  It's short, but will make your day and maybe help you on your way:  http://momastery.com/blog/2014/07/06/body-masterpiece/

Week 25 Weigh In - Focus and Goals

179 lbs.

Another week of Optifast down, and God only knows how many more to go :-)  I'm not complaining, I'm committed to the ride, and I'm so thankful for this journey.  But the experience is different now.  In the earlier weeks it was easier to stay focused.  I had more milestones to look forward to and accomplish.  I'm starting to tick them off of the milestone chart now and the list is happily getting shorter.  But some of the biggies are still left to accomplish!  Despite this, though, I realize that I need to find something more to focus on, instead of the day that I can start eating again, and I think the next logical step would be for me to rededicate myself to establishing an exercise routine.  Today in our Optifast class we were visited by an exercise physiologist who talked about the importance of resistance training/weight lifting.  I admit that I've been avoiding this because I'm pretty naturally muscular and am able to build muscle easily.  I didn't want to stall my weight loss since this is my primary focus.  The exercise physiologist changed my mind, though.  I realize that now that I'm in the home stretch, I should start to not only tone my muscles, but more importantly, incorporate weight lifting into my routine.

I haven't fully reestablished my exercise routine since I left my job at the end of May.  Summer kicked in, the kids are home from school, I'm at home for the first time in close to 10 years, and I've started working more on a side business (due to my husband's impending exit from his job).  There is a steep learning curve with this as well.  I'm spending more time on the computer.  And I confess that it's not all business -- I enjoy checking MyFitnessPal, and reading and discovering new fitness blogs. The time suck happens in a blink of an eye.

These are excuses, and I completely realize that I have time to work out.  This is how unexpected life changes (and the resulting paralysis, stress or depression), if I let them suck all of my attention, take over and distract me from my health goals.  I've done this countless times.  Starting a new job, having a baby, moving, injuries, kids activities...the list goes on... and will continue to go on for the rest of my life.  I think this is a good time to stop and recognize what is happening and learn how to deal with change, and prioritize my health and wellness.  This is why I'm treating this experience as so much more than a "diet".  If I want to make this wonderful progress last, I need to stay vigilant and disciplined and focused on my new healthy priorities.  The rest of my life needs to accommodate THOSE things.  Not the other way around.

It all comes down to why I started in the first place.  I want to have more fun and more joy in my life, and being healthy is the only way for me to achieve this (especially the kind of fun I'm thinking of!).   I think now is the prefect time to re-post my vision board and remember why I'm seeking this change.


I hope you all are staying strong and feeling good.  If you're not, keep going anyway and don't give up. We're in this thing together.

Creating a Positive Vision of Success

I figured out how to ignore my rumbling weekend tummy today.  I worked on a vision board assignment that we are supposed to complete for my Kaiser group.  That was a fun project!  Who knew there were so many memes and blogs devoted to diet motivation?  I scored some tools for my toolbox for sure.

I came up with images of outdoorsy fun, joy, adventure!  There is also a flirty and casual stylista deep within, and I look forward to expressing it.  As much as I have joy in my life now, I can't wait to try new things.  I want to live life to the fullest both now and when I'm older.  Looking at the vision board, I know it's not perfectly straight or lined up - I'm not a graphic designer.  But I think I captured what was in my heart pretty well.  Hopefully after a few months, I'll be uploading images of ME doing these things.

But first I will have to get through the temptations of the weekend.  Tonight I have my first big social gathering with my book group.  A terrific group of ladies who I love, and who I know will understand and respect this new path I'm on. I'm bringing some sparkling water, a shake, and a soup packet so that I can enjoy dinner with everyone.  I hope you all are staying strong and having a great weekend too.